Reviews

Between 2005-2016 I wrote more than 2,000 reviews for the Chicago Tribune's RedEye. Here's a good place to start.

Get 'Night Swim' some floaties

Universal

Complicated, ridiculous, and serious don’t mix, and the title of “Night Swim” sounds a lot more terrifyingly tense than the occasionally creepy nonsense that actually unfolds. “Dehydrated.” “Water You Doing?” “Pool Me Twice.” “Heal, No.” Any of these would’ve better suited the story of an innocent family and the seemingly magic, actually demonic watering hole they discover in their backyard. Though they’d also suggest a level of fun that isn’t here either; this PG-13-rated horror flick is murky and dumb and neither shallow nor deep, and not enough of anything in particular.

Suggesting both that now she’s getting big parts (hooray!) and that those parts need to be better, Kerry Condon (Oscar-nominated for “The Banshees of Inisherin,” should’ve won) stars as Eve, who moves with her two kids and retired baseball player husband (Wyatt Russell) almost singlehandedly based on the new house’s pool. That’s because Ray, a retired baseball player whose name assumedly nods to a very different baseball movie Ray, has been diagnosed with MS and would love the convenience of water therapy just outside his back door. Also, the house itself doesn’t seem to be haunted, and who would ask a pool cleaner to do an exorcism while they’re at it?

Sadly, the plot isn’t that straightforward (there’s a whole involuntary, very obvious monkey’s paw component), and director/co-writer Bryce McGuire (“Unfollowed” and the “Night Swim” short film) wades farther away from menace the more he hinges on attempted shocks involving screaming underwater creatures. Overhead shots of the pool go from impressive to repetitive, and no built-in fondness for the stars can compensate for the narrative’s reliance on children in danger to create emotional stakes. “Kiddie Pool” probably would be a more accurate title (the problems occur all day, not just at night) and arguably as sinister.

Although there’s also a cat involved, so maybe “Kiddie Kitty Pool,” by which I mean I’ve lost all interest in further thought about “Night Swim” and am now just amusing myself.

C-

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